You don't need self-esteem, you need self-confidence ? Think Like A ...

February is National Self-Esteem Month; I hate the term. You don?t need self ?esteem,? what you need is genuine confidence. This may be a semantic argument, but it?s a very important one.

Self-esteem simply means a favorable impression of oneself. This favorable impression may or may not be based in reality; the fact is you can have a grandiose impression of your Self which is shared by nobody but you. Know anybody like that?

Confidence is a reasonable belief in your abilities and capabilities shaped by training, knowledge and experience. Genuine self-confidence is not surety of a particular outcome, but rather surety in dedicated preparation.

The difference is that with self-esteem you may believe in your Self; with authentic self-confidence you also know you?re prepared for what you?re about to face.

In martial arts we make a clear distinction between someone who talks the talk and someone who walks the walk. Too many techniques designed to improve self-esteem rely on affirmations and self-talk. Those are good tools, but don?t stop there!

The techniques for building self-confidence are mindful or deliberate practice and continual dedication to self-improvement.

You could say that most techniques for building self-esteem are equivalent to reading everything you can about boxing and continually telling yourself you?re a great fighter. You build self-confidence by spending hours busting your knuckles in the gym and testing yourself against worthy adversaries.

Self-esteem is important in the sense that we?d all like to feel good about ourselves. You feel a hell of a lot better when you know that feeling is based on hard work and actual experience. The best part is that the harder you work, the better you will feel about your Self and that feeling will be much more authentic and lasting.

Self-esteem is loud; confidence is quiet. That quiet, calm demeanor often associated with martial artists is an expression of genuine confidence. You can project that same confidence when you know you?ve done the work necessary to prepare for whatever challenge or opportunity you face.

Do the work. Do the training. Do the learning. Do the preparation. Accept the fact that you are a continual work in progress and embrace that work.

That?s what we call Kung Fu!

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February 22, 2012
Categories: Business Life, Campus Life, Family Life, Inspiration & Motivation, Leadership, Personal Growth, Self-Esteem & Confidence . Tags: achievement, Black Belt Mindset, book, books, confidence, inspiration, Jim Bouchard, motivational speaker, perseverance, personal development, resilience, self esteem, self improvement, self-confidence, self-help, Think Like a Black Belt . Author: jimbouchard

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